(Reblogged from celestial-octopus)

hoganddice:

takethethirdoption:

I went to an Arab-American comedy night and there was a Muslim guy making a joke about being in high school football.

"I was hit so hard, I saw Jesus. Do you know how hard you have to be hit to see somebody else’s god?"

This is what jokes about religion are supposed to look like.

(Reblogged from pontoofarrr)
st0n3rjesus:

contingent-dreams:

lunar-raspberry:

"And what do we say to death?""Not today."

"The fuck out my face"

"Talk to the hand"

st0n3rjesus:

contingent-dreams:

lunar-raspberry:

"And what do we say to death?"

"Not today."

"The fuck out my face"

"Talk to the hand"

(Reblogged from pontoofarrr)

twowhovianhearts:

askenjonine:

kierstiel:

221becquerel:

zchr:

what if you woke up with amnesia and all you could remember was your tumblr password and you had to discover who you were based off your posts

“wow I sure had a thing for boats”

#’wait am i a gay man’

image

this is the most perfect thing on tumblr omfg

(Reblogged from pontoofarrr)
(Reblogged from straight-pride-month)

Having OCD : Cleaning 1.5 wardrobes in 5 hours and then worrying about the clothes not being clean enough to put in.

4gifs:

When airport employees get bored

4gifs:

When airport employees get bored

(Source: ForGIFs.com)

(Reblogged from celestial-octopus)

thesugarhole:

if we are talking in person and i accidentally spit dont even call out i saw it and im dead inside

(Source: thesugarhole)

(Reblogged from mr-radical)

lunateacrossing:

when u send a shirt to a villager to wear and they use it to decorate their house

image

(Reblogged from mr-radical)

rebeccacrane:

do you ever see someone loving on ur fav character and ur like

u have good taste but

they’re mine

(Reblogged from mr-radical)